Sports and my thoughts

Monday, October 31, 2005

Men are happier

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from
such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The
garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of
themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can
be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear
a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO
shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the
truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to
drive to another gas station restroom because this
one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and
think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work,
more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress
$5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your
chest when you're talking to
them. The occasional well-rendered belch is
practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister,
or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone
conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know
stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only
one suitcase. You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still
be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a
three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public. You
are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color. The
same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You
only have to shave your face and neck. You can play
with toys all your life. Your ! belly usually hides
your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one
color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter
how your l! egs look . You can "do" your nails with a
pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning
growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for
25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. No wonder
men are happier.

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